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Adding to Your Marriage Toolbox

A follow up devotional for couples based on lessons from the 2020 Virginia Marriage Retreat

Mitchells and Bentons

Dream Home: Building with a Marriage Toolbox

 Unless the Lord builds the house,
    the builders labor in vain.

Psalm 127:1a New International Version (NIV)

Last weekend (February 22-23, 2020) was an incredible time of fellowship and renewing our relationships at the Virginia Marriage Retreat in Williamsburg, VA. Chip and Ruby Mitchell, Evangelist and Women’s Ministry Leader of the Greater Philadelphia Church of Christ taught us about building our dream home marriages using a righteous toolbox of God’s Word.

Mary and I have known Chip and Ruby for many years, starting with Chip leading the Worcester church while we were there as young parents in the mid-1990’s. We have so many great memories of them as they became young marrieds and parents, and we’ve seen them grow over the years as they’ve served in various roles in the Boston church and now in Philadelphia. We treasure the time we had with them in Worcester, and enjoy the times we can share now at various events in the ACR Region of churches, events like the 2020 Virginia Marriage Retreat!

The lessons and sharing from the Mitchells are available via audio (links below). In the spirit of our midweek lesson before the Marriage Retreat (see our Better Together post), we’re providing discussion questions in this post that you can use with your spouse to apply the lessons to your marriage.

Saturday Session 1: Dream Home Class 1

  • Key Thought: Expressing God’s mercy to one another.
  • Discussion Topics:
    • List some ways that God has shown you mercy individually and as a couple.
    • List 10 words or phrases that communicate grace to one another, for example: “I need you” “you make me a better husband/wife”, etc. Use them in your conversations this week.
  • Audio available here.

Saturday Session 2: Dream Home Class 2

  • Key Thought: Using your “righteous toolbox”.
  • Discussion Topics:
    • List some tools that you should have ready in your “righteous toolbox”.
    • Write slips of paper with scriptures on the fruits of the Spirit, then put them in a box (or even a small toolbox) and pull one out to share with each other in times of conflict.
  • Audio available here.

Saturday Men’s session: Dream Home for Men

  • Key Thought: Meeting our spouse’s biggest needs.
  • Discussion Topic:
    • Remember PIES? What are her physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual needs?
    • Discuss with her what you can do to better meet her needs.
  • Audio available here.

Saturday Women’s session: Dream Home for Women

  • Key Thought: ***check back later – Mary will be providing this soon.
  • Discussion Topics:
  • Audio available here.

Sunday Worship sermon: Home Improvement

  • Key Thought: Putting the Word of God into action.
  • Discussion Topics:
    • Read through Galatians 5 together and identify a few ways to improve an area of your marriage from the list. For example, being more loving or finding times to enjoy peace together by getting away for a weekend.
    • While we’re on that topic… plan a follow-up retreat, just the two of you, overnight without the kids to put the Word and the Mitchell’s lessons into practice.
  • Audio available here.

Concluding Thoughts

22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. 24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.

Galatians 5:22-25 New International Version (NIV)

Mary and I are grateful for the love the Mitchells have shown us personally over the years and for sharing their lives and lessons on marriage with the Virginia family of churches.

We hope you keep your marriage toolbox full of tools from the fruit of the Spirit!

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